PICTURE

Saturday 3 September 2016

I'm Dreading My Baby Shower


I never wanted a Baby Shower. Let me make that clear. If I’m honest, a baby shower is close to my worst nightmare, but it’s the first grandchild, and I’m the first of my friends group to fall pregnant, therefore I’m not really getting a choice in the matter. When everyone asks if I’m excited for my shower, they ask expecting the same answer - yes; super excited. But I’m not. And here’s my reasons why.



1. I HATE Being The Centre Of Attention.
Flashback to the stress of my 21st Birthday Party which I decided to have in a function hall with 120 of my ‘closest’ friends. I couldn’t tell you the surname of a quarter of those 120 people, it escapes me now why I ever thought sharing my birthday night with such a big group would be a good idea. I don’t like people looking at me, I don’t like everyone focusing on me, and I especially don’t want to be fussed over, at 21 that was bad enough, never mind adding in a pregnancy. Pregnancy comes with fuss, that much is a given, do I really need a day centred around it? A joint baby shower would be perfect. All of the positives, few of the negatives. Too bad I have no friends ready to pop…

2. Do I Seem Greedy?
I won’t lie, it’s crossed my mind before. Does a baby shower make you greedy? Never before was a baby shower such a common-place thing, but now, it just seems like another more radicalised ploy for companies to make money. You can’t show up to a baby shower without a present. I’m sorry, but you can’t. Even if they ban presents - which I very much tried to do - everyone will still show up with a packet of baby grows and say they don’t count as a proper present. But that then leaves question marks for the birth, no one comes to see the baby without a little gift, or at least I wouldn’t. Long gone are the days when you knitted a cardigan and called it quits at that. I don’t want everyone to think I’m having a baby shower for the sake of extra gifts, if I’m honest, I’d much rather they didn’t bother at all.

3. I Don’t Want To Be Ungrateful, But…
I don’t need 13 baby blankets and a handful of baby memory books. I can’t begin to explain how appreciative I would be that people go to the effort to buy the baby something, it’s extremely kind and I’d imagine it would be overwhelming on the day, but for the expense of the things you’d receive at a shower, you could probably provide years worths of Nappies, Wipes, and Sudocreme, those things that people don’t generally buy. I’ve been to two baby showers. Both times, I bought what I deemed to be the cutest little newborn set from Next - as did a handful of other people at those showers. I’d have been better off just handing over formula, it would have gotten more use! You can’t help but sound ungrateful, but when times are tough for a lot of people, I’d rather people kept there money!



4. I Hate Games.
I’m too competitive. I can’t be mature and sophisticated whilst playing Pin the Dummy on the Baby - chances are I’ll fight with my mother and law and have my son disowned before he even enters the world. I also don’t want folks measuring my stomach.. Belly buttons freak me out, and displaying mine to forty people is far from appealing. Also, need I mention that having 40 or so of my close friends and family get merry on Prosecco whilst I stick to my apple juice is just plain mean. I avoid nights out for that very reason, why bring one to my house?

5. I Can’t Afford It.
I personally cannot. Not the way Baby Showers are these days. I’d rather spend the money I’d spend on finger sandwiches, blue balloons and a function hall on my child. I just would. It’s such a financially tight time, and I never did factor in a baby shower to that. I’m lucky in that I have absolutely nothing to do with mine, my mum and friends have planned everything by themselves, and I’ve been told to turn up at the stated time. Not everyone is that lucky though, and I know if I was having to pay for everything myself, then I wouldn’t have even bothered in the first place.


 I’ve wrote this as close as possible to my actual baby shower - 45 minutes prior to be exact. I wanted to be able to reflect straight after with both views, my opinion before and hopefully my changed opinion after. I’d like to think I’ll be proved wrong, but I can’t say I have too high expectations, and I’m simply going to go into the day with an open mind. It’s a day for family and friends to come together - and lots of cake, I may have my doubts about it, but at least there will still be cake…

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